Saturday, March 16, 2013

Curious George Flies a Kite - Recap No. 1

I watched this episode with my daughter. 

After a comfortable night in his twin bed, George is awakened by a stiff breeze blowing outside, and immediately, he decides he wants to see how much shit he can lose in said breeze. He runs downstairs, where he finds the Man in the Yellow Hat hard at work at watercolors or some shit, because he doesn't work and is a huge disappointment to his parents, waiting anxiously for a fucking grandchild, or maybe he's a successful meth dealer and ho, ho, doesn't need to work like regular folk. 

When George looks longingly at the Yellow Hat because how awesome would it be to see that bacteria trap fly away, the Man yells at him, as the Man is wont to do, both in the show, and in real life, but I suppose that's a subplot we'll have to deal with later, because before you know it, the goddamn monkey is outside with an armful of supplies that, get this, he intends to lose in the wind, because I suppose those work-release crews from the local jail need SOMETHING to clean up, and I guess this is the Man's way of telling that "Give a Hoot Don't Pollute" owl to go fuck himself or whatever. 

SOOOO, anyway, George starts yammering away with the local neighbor kid flying his kite like a goddamn kite ninja. He and George go on and on for a bit, so I guess he's learned how to talk Monkey at school, and the kid is one of these real "I studied wind patterns for three years" douchebags, and he won't let George anywhere near his kite.

Some other narrative device kicks in, and George is all of a sudden airborne with this kite, and now there's a squirrel on his head. The kid runs to tell the Man that shockingly, George has gotten in trouble again, and the Man tells the kid to call the fire department, because yet again, the Man cannot control his fucking simian companion, and what a terrific use of resources this is for Yellow-Hat-Man-Ville or whatever the hell this place is called. 

I don't know much, but I know that I don't want to be the kid calling the fire department to report a flying monkey, because then they'll think I'm using meth (and I am, obviously, but that is ANOTHER STORY for ANOTHER TIME). 

Move on to the Man rescuing George in his own Yellow Hang Glider, which he flies like he's Maverick from Top Gun splashing those naughty Communist MiGs in the Indian Ocean. He rescues the monkey and the squirrel and everyone lives happily ever after. 

Except the locality, which spent $14,000 in responding to the Man's emergency call, which of course he didn't even need in the first place.